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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25633270">between this breath and the next</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackBlood1872/pseuds/BlackBlood1872'>BlackBlood1872</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Torn at the Seams (TMA ficlets) [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Magnus Archives (Podcast)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Character Study, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Post-MAG 161, Post-MAG 169, Temporary Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:35:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>351</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25633270</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackBlood1872/pseuds/BlackBlood1872</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>They are able to pass through the Powers' domains, unafraid—but at a cost.</p>
<p>Martin can't remember if he agreed to the price, but it's far too late to contest it.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Torn at the Seams (TMA ficlets) [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1858171</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>27</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>between this breath and the next</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p>Dying doesn't hurt. It's the coming back that aches.</p>
<p>………</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>
    <em>"It doesn't want to harm me."</em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>"And me?"</em>
  </p>
  <p>
    <em>"I won't let it."</em>
  </p>
</blockquote><p>Pretty words. A simple promise to make, inside four walls that only wanted to trap them, only wanted to keep them locked away and brainwashed, safe for as long as they let themselves believe it.</p>
<p>(<em>Never</em>, for one.</p>
<p>For the other, only so long as he had hope—a fragile and wavering thing, held with the lightest possible pressure, lest it shatter into a thousand, irreparable pieces. As it did, soon enough; as he knew it would, eventually.)</p>
<p>Pretty words. An impossible promise.</p>
<p>The flames were what hurt the worst—the first death that had a slow enough journey that he could feel it. Fire like ribbons, caressing over cloth and flesh and bone, so warm, so gentle—and then digging deeper, into the nerves, and searing with a white-hot agony that stole his breath before he could even think to scream.</p>
<p>After that, nothing.</p>
<p>And then the first breath in a restored body and the phantom ache of burning under his skin, like the itch of a sunburn. Added to and layered over all the other pains that cling to him now, the shadows of domains that let them pass through, unafraid—but at a cost.</p>
<p>Martin doesn't know if he consented to the toll, when they started this journey. Can't remember if he knew this would happen, if he gauged it to be a reasonable trade for what they hoped to accomplish.</p>
<p>Or, worse, if he hadn't been the one to choose. If it had been Jon who Knew, who saw the price for taking an unclaimed soul through the Powers' hearts, and deemed it acceptable.</p>
<p>Martin doesn't think he wants to know the answer to that. Perhaps it's a kindness that he likely never will.</p>
<p>(And perhaps that's just another lie he tells himself in order to push ever onward. To willingly walk to his death, again and again, all for the chance to fix what's been broken.)</p>
<p>(As if they have the ability to do that.)</p>
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